Today is my wedding anniversary

With Hina,

Life has its twists n turns.

When we met n married we never thought,

Six years later

One of us would be in heaven,

One of us on earth waiting to greet her again.

They say make new memories to forget the past,

I tried and failed.

If the past is our soulmate,

They cannot be forgotten.

Hina I will never forget,

Our love.

Our love of our life

And it’s death that,

Defined us both.

Patience.

My Mum used to tell me…

“Rome was not built in a day.. And she told me to live one day at a time… have patience and faith and take one step at a time”

And she said “Have your own identity and your own goals then have the patience and commitment to achieving them and all will be well in your heart Son as you gave your best.”

Thank you Mum for giving me my IDENTITY in life and INDIVUALITY that no one can take away. Without you I would not exist. Thanks Mum for being you and sticking with me for 47 years since you carried me.

😁 Have a blessed day World.

Her..

Hina gone in her body

Here in her Spirit and Soul

“Something In The Way She Moves”

James Taylor

Something in the way she moves, or looks my way, or calls my name
That seems to leave this troubled world behind
And if I’m feeling down and blue or troubled by some foolish game
She always seems to make me change my mind..

And I feel fine anytime she’s around me now, she’s around me now almost all the time
And if I’m well you can tell she’s been with me now
She’s been with me now quite a long, long time and I feel fine

Every now and then the things I lean on lose their meaning
And I find myself careening in places where I should not let me go
She has the power to go where no one else can find me and to silently remind me
Of the happiness and the good times that I know, and then I just got to go then

It isn’t what she’s got to say but how she thinks and where she’s been
To me, the words are nice, the way they sound
I like to hear them best that way, it doesn’t much matter what they mean
She says them mostly just to calm me down

And I feel fine anytime she’s around me now, she’s around me now almost all the time
And if I’m well you can tell she’s been with me now
She’s been with me now quite a long, long time and I feel fine

Have a Blessed day world.

Enjoy the Spring.. Appreciate another year of Life.

Mum commented to me the other day

That when she closes her eyes

She dreams of leaves and flowers

And sees the details of each leaf n petal in her mind before she goes to sleep

She feels like a hummingbird that get close to each flower

So we went out again

To see the sun and smell the leaves and flowers for real

Have a Bless day world.

Never cage a bird :)

My Mum transferred from wheel chair to car today.. and had a nice day out in the sun. Mum and I have driven all over England in the 1970s 80s and early 90s then all over the Usa from 1998 until 2012. Mum and I have driven on the outskirts of a moving tornado in Oklahoma back in 2008. Her ability to sit in a car after her disability was diminished.. however Mum can’t stay in a cage.. she is as free as a bird. Have a good day world.

Inclusion

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Inclusion relates to areas such as race, gender, disability, age, sexual orientation and religious beliefs. People have the same right to receive care whatever their background or beliefs. A care worker in any health or social care setting needs not only to be aware of this but also to be active in promoting it in their practice. Equality and Inclusion apply not only to the people we support but also our fellow carers. They are two of the essential values which underpin health and social care.

Ignorance of cultural values is a Barrier to Inclusion. Understanding and promoting cultural values can draw people together increasing communication between the carer and the people we care for. It is important that the people we care for can express their needs.

pet me cat

Inclusion helps the people we care for live an active life, empowering them to speak up and express cultural identity that makes people smile and cats purr.

Our Identities are often the Sum of our Experiences and the Fruit of our Dreams. Lets Not forget that.

Good Day World..

Meeoow

Why use Wheel Chairs?

Why do people use wheel chairs?
People use wheelchairs for many different reasons. Wheelchairs enable freedom of mobility, like a car or a bicycle. If we are interacting with a wheelchair user for the first time, it can be difficult to know how to act. We don’t want to accidentally offend someone, but at the same time, we want to be helpful and understanding. The most important thing to remember is people who use wheelchairs are really no different from us.
Golden Rules when speaking with a person on a wheelchair…
1. Avoid making presumptions about the other’s abilities
2. Speak directly to a person using a wheelchair
3. Ask permission before touching the user or their wheelchair

(Wikihow 2018)

Have a Bless Day World.

Painful Questions…

Is Pain just in the Mind or Is Pain a Real and Distinct Experience?

Is Pain Subjective and Different for Everyone..or is it the Same for Everyone?

Can we know Happiness by Appreciating the Painful Times?Should we Appreciate Happiness in between the Painful Times..?

Do we Deserve Pain..???

All people Experience Pain whether Physical, Mental or Emotional at many Times in Life.

No One Deserves Pain…

So We Learn to Live with it Using the Power of our Bodies and Minds and Souls.

We Endure with Courage and Move beyond Pain with Hope and Imagination. We Learn that Creating our Future puts our Pain in the Past.

Our Pain is as Unique as our Selves…So Another’s Pain is Just as Important as our Own.

Good Day to the World.

Autism means Unique

Autism stands for:
Always Unique Totally Intelligent Sometimes Mysterious 😁

Parents and Guardians of autistic children have a difficult job of raising a child that cannot socially interact or learn from society’s Norms and expected behaviour.

Uniqueness is not a disability.. it can be an asset to an individual. Being unique is what makes an individual be different from everyone else.

Around 10% of autistic people have incredible abilities due to the nature of autistic spectrum disorder. These individuals are called savants and often their incredible talents are nurtured from a young age.

Autism is a developmental disorder that affects 1/100 people. Symptoms of autism include difficulty in social interaction and communication due to restricted and repetitive patterns of behaviour. Many people do not realise how many people around them are actually autistic. All autistic children grow up to be autistic adults..

Autism has affected over 700,000 people in the UK as of 2018. This means that over 2.8 million people have a relative who is autistic.
Autism is incurable however can be alleviated by much support from the community and parents. However there are many social problems that society causes through ignorance or lack of caring.

Sad statistics:😓
Over 34 percent of children say that their school environment is worse than what they expect and that other children pick on them due to a disability..
Over 70 percent of autistic adults say they don’t get any help or support..
Only 16 percent of autistic adults are in full time work that is paid..

If the treatment is incurable it’s up to society to adjust to a condition that is caused by nature and not upto the individual who is born with a natural condition

(Statistics from National Autism Society)

Good day to the World.

Dognity ;)

Wheel chairs are used for dogs who are disabled through a paralysis of their hind legs. The condition is called degenerative myelopathy. This condition is a degradation in the nerve cells between the brain and the hind legs. Dogs are unsung Heroes and greatly help blind people and many other people with disabilities.

Woof.

This is a positive website with no Names and no Blames.

Just to reiterate and reinforce, nothing I share on here will be a negative reflection on any individual and any organisation. The blog seeks to raise awareness, raise understanding and help people smile and laugh if they actually find it funny.. lol.

I’m thankful I chose a culture of understanding and positive communication not a culture of blame/shame that has the effect of reinforcing stigma, and putting people down that has the effect of undermining caring/ethical people.

Thanks for reading this blog.

Good Day world.

Autistic Heroes at the Together Trust in Cheadle

I have a good friend who works there.. she is an Unsung Hero.. you know who you are 😁.. I’m so Proud of her for being a kind and ethical human being.

Inscape House School is a non-maintained day special school in Cheadle, Cheshire maintained by the Together Trust. They meet the needs of children and young people aged 5 to 19 years with autism spectrum conditions and related social communication difficulties. The school is fully committed to safeguarding the pupils..

More about unsung heroes who work with autism, autistic children and adults who have abilities beyond a person without autism.. As soon as I get home…

Someone chose to ignore the Facade upon my Face and be open minded.

Today I was able to let go of inhibitions and fear of judgement immediately, to communicate with a person who was open to seeing past the obvious and the Facade that we have that is our Faces.
The conversation revolved around death.. people’s attitude towards loss.. how people deal with grief.. how people overcome the barriers that other people put in place.. how people maintain their self-esteem and self identity, throughout hardship and loss of close people or memory.. I found myself opening up and speaking about things and about people long gone that I would never just casually bring up.
The person I was speaking with had the effect of putting me at ease about very difficult subjects that they obviously knew much about and had an emotional empathy with due to their own circumstances.
Closed people often cannot deal with other people’s openness. An open mind often comes across as a threat to a closed mind. In care it’s important to garner the trust of the person we are caring for. Having an open mind and an understanding helps Foster Trust and is vital to the care giver relationship with the person cared for.

Thanks to that person they are an Unsung Hero .. their work helps a lot of people within Dementia care.

Good day to the world.

The Forgotten.

They have no family that speak for them. Their families never come to visit them. No one celebrates their birthdays or sits with them for a nice meal. They depend upon the compassion and grace of individuals who give care. When they pass away we sometimes remember them when we have time…then we become too busy caring for the Living to remember who Passed, as it’s natural to pass away and it is something we accept must happen..

The forgotten are sometimes are isolated and left to their own devices illnesses and karma.

I care for people like this as do many other carers . Sometimes the individual needs a lot of care.. so we care for those People who need our support… Some of the forgotten have no family and no friends… Sometimes they have loving family that see them often..

They cannot participate in activities for their own benefit they are usually too injured physically and mentally to be able to respond mentally or verbally. They cannot express their needs as they are dealing with pain that we cannot imagine.

As carers we try to imagine their needs and empathize with their feelings. We try to put ourselves in their shoes and treat them how we would want to be treated.

Human beings can be Angels or Devils. Where I work there are Angels.

Good Day to the world.

Unsung Heroes (no songs written about them)

If life was a competition there would be 99.99% losers (unsung heroes) and 0.01% winners (heroes we sing about). Trophies are handed out to philanthropists (for example Bill Gates owner of Microsoft) and people who come first in a competition. Yet the average care worker, volunteer, family member or friend will be lucky it doesn’t rain at the bus stop on the way home after a hard day’s slog helping someone for minimum or no wage. They ask for no attention but they know that the work they do is appreciated by the person receiving the care or help. In turn someone is Always Kind to them… “sewing Kindness reaps Kindness”…instant karma.

A desert nomad would feel rich in a desert with water and food. A caring person would feel rich in a caring environment. We Sew our own environment and we are Responsible for it.

We are all individuals. Humanity is an ocean of them. The reality is that all of us are in a cycle of life; no one cured Death..and we are all Heroes and Winners within that cycle. So if we don’t see it already let’s open up our vision and recognise ourselves as being Human, Finite, Unique and Worthy of Care.

There will be much to write about Unsung Heroes who neither ask for attention nor receive any…. however their stories give us HOPE. “Abnormal” people who are judged by society are Loved by Someone. Every winner’s podium was built by someone we don’t sing about who was Less than Perfect. Every wheel chair was built by Someone Unknown.

Good Day World

1960 Paralympics in Rome

Paralympians in 1960 show the world their common spirit.

The very first Paralympic games took place in Stoke in 1948. The Olympians were ex service members who had lost limbs in WW2.

The Paralympic Games in Rome in 1960 was disorganised and undignified.. symptomatic of the attitudes in the 1950s and 60s.

Soldiers carried competitors to and from the athletes’ village. When archer Margaret Maughan won Britain’s first-ever gold medal in the Paralympics, there was no ramp for the podium. Times and attitudes have changed for the better.

(Source BBC News)

Below is a picture of British archery champion Margaret Maughan receiving her gold medal at the 1966 Paralympic event in Jamaica. Note the podium ramp for the winners. To take part in these events is itself an achievement in anyone’s life.

Good Day World.

The 2018 ParaLympic Winter Games – a Picture is worth a Thousand words.

Good Morning World, As this website is ultimately about real people and their stories..here goes.. below is a real picture of an event at the ParaLympic Games 2018..

winter-paralympics
If I fall on my hazardous and slippery journey I will climb back up as I already Climbed a Mountain to Achieve this one goal.. I dare to trust my strength and will power.

Proof that there is life after being physically challenged. More to come about people who dare to dream..and dare to achieve their dream..

Disabilities.. abnormality.. imperfections..

Have recently learned that disabilities are part of life’s journey and how we perceive ourselves is the key to our lives.
The word itself is a limitation on the abilities of a person. Language is used to define a human being and categorise them through ability. If we teach ourselves to limit our abilities and our understanding of our world through language, we will live in a box of perceived social and psychological walls. These Walls form a mental Maze through which we must navigate to succeed in our goals in life. Let’s take away the Maze and open up a Clear Vision of what we can achieve.
I believe all people are disabled and Disability is normal. What is normal anyway? Who gets to decide what’s normal? And what is perfect?? And only Superman is invulnerable to sickness…he lives in a comic…
All human beings live a cycle of life… Biology 101.
I thank my tutors and my college and work buddies. I thank my family for reading this blog.
Laughter and understanding helped me through living in three countries with a “”disabled”” wife and mother.
Good Day to the world.

First blog post

Good Evening avid readers of yet another new blog.

Lol.

My name is Vejay (i like to be called John – one syllable is easier on the tongue than two).

I am writing this knowing that there are many people who write about their own perspective of life on the internet; whilst taking up the time of busy people. So to those who are not so busy; and sit down once in a while to read; i hope this blog helps your Life or helps you Laugh and Smile

Have a great evening world..